Why do I cry so much? Should I get help?

So many parts of the human experience can elicit tears. Crying is a common emotional response, and it can vary in intensity and regularity from person to person. Some people have frequent, cathartic cries, while others rarely shed a tear, even when they’re in emotional pain. But, when frequent crying gets in the way of your daily life, or is accompanied by other issues, your tears may be trying to tell you something about your psychological well-being.  

In this article, we’ll talk about what causes emotional tears and and whether or not you need to get help for it.

Why do people cry?

There’s no one reason why humans cry. There isn’t even one way that people cry. In addition to shedding tears, some people vocalize their emotional pain or find their facial muscles twist themselves into expressions of distress, happiness, or other emotional states.  

You probably have a good idea of what makes adults cry. Crying is a natural response to breakups, physical pain, or finding out that a loved one has passed. Work-related problems overwhelming experiences of art (sad movies in particular), interpersonal conflicts, rejection, victories (in sport or otherwise), and weddings, and other expressions of love can all elicit tears. Sometimes, when we feel a mix of emotions, it can make us cry more easily. One of the biggest reasons for this is feeling powerless or unable to change a situation.  

Not all tears are triggered by emotions. Some are reflexive. When a foreign substance gets in your eye or irritates its surface, your lacrimal glands may release tears in an effort to flush out the problem material. Meanwhile, another form of tears, called basal tears, work to keep your eyes properly moisturized and protected.  

Is crying every day bad?

Context is key when it comes to crying. If you tend to chop onions daily and crying while doing so is a natural response that probably does not have implications for your mental health.  

Even if you’re crying emotional tears every day (as opposed to reflexive tears), the crying itself can’t be properly termed “bad.” If anything, the causes of the tears may have a negative cast—you may be crying because of a recent death in the family, for example.  

Ultimately, there isn’t a “right” or “wrong” to crying, and factors like age, gender, and one’s environment can affect the likelihood that a person will cry more or less often. (For instance, according to some research, women cry 4-5 times per month on average, men 0-1 times.)

If you find yourself crying daily and you’re concerned that something might be amiss in your mental health, you might consider consulting a doctor, who will be able to help you determine whether your tears are symptoms of depression or another mental health issue. To get started, fill out Talkiatry’s quick online assessment.

What are the potential benefits of crying?

Crying is a normal response. For humans, it is the result of millennia of evolution and cultural influence and is thus a highly complex phenomenon. Broadly speaking, some research supports the view that crying can help bolster social connections and stoke sympathy for the crier. Babies, for example, may cry to attract the attention of their parents.  

For individual adults, crying may also provide, directly or indirectly, relief or catharsis—what we think of as a good cry—possibly through the release of certain neurochemicals like oxytocin and self-soothing practices.

At the same time not crying, or seldom crying, isn’t reason to worry. A seeming lack of emotional expression isn’t uncommon, especially among  men. Not crying isn’t harmful to your well-being. However in some cases, people who don’t cry may feel less empathy for others.

10 reasons you might be over-sensitive or cry more frequently

• Grief: Losing a loved one ranks among the most difficult experiences a person can go through, and regular crying may occur for some time afterwards.  

• Hormones and hormonal imbalances: Prolactin and testosterone levels may have an effect on crying frequency, with the former possibly lowering a person’s crying threshold and the latter likely raising it, though more research into this matter is needed. Menopause and PMS may also affect your hormone levels

• Burnout: If you’re at the end of your rope because of requirements of work, life, and/or an imbalance between the two, you may give outward form to your frustrations by crying.

• Lack of sleep: If you’re not getting enough sleep, you may have more difficulties moderating your emotions and thus may be given to frequent bouts of crying.  

• Stress: Sustained stress may make you less resilient and more likely to have strong reactions (such as crying) to bad news or undesired occurrences.  

• Loneliness: Humans are social creatures, so if you feel alone and despondent, you may find yourself crying at a higher rate than usual.  

• Medication side effects: The interactions between an individual’s biochemistry and medications are complex. If you determine that you’ve started crying more after taking a medication, consider consulting the doctor who prescribed it to you.  

• Life changes: The end of a romantic relationship, the loss of employment, and other major shifts in your life may cause you to feel destabilized and more prone to bursts of emotional crying.  

• Mental health conditions: Major depressive disorder and other mental health conditions don’t always  cause people to cry frequently, but if you believe one such condition may be contributing to the regularity of your crying, consider getting professional help. A licensed mental health professional can help you figure out what you’re going through. You might also try Talkiatry. We’re a national psychiatry practice that treats a variety of conditions. Get started by filling out a quick online assessment.

FAQs  

Have more questions about emotional crying? Here's what else to know.

Why do I cry so much and so easily?  

There’s no one answer to this question, but in short, if you cry frequently and/or with minimal triggering, you may be an especially sensitive person, or going through a difficult life event, or under the effects of particular hormones, among other explanations. Crying is a complex phenomenon and humans are complex creatures, meaning that any explanation of your crying habits may be—you guessed it—complex.  

How do I stop crying?

Taking deep breaths and utilizing grounding techniques can help you stop crying, but remember, crying isn’t something that necessarily needs to be stopped. However, if you believe that you are crying too much, consider speaking with doctor who can help you assess whether there’s a medical reason behind it, whether its stress hormones or a mental health condition.

What are symptoms of depression?

Signs of clinical depression include feeling sad, worthless, and hopeless. It can also lead to a loss of interest and a loss of energy, all of which might lead to crying.

The information in this article is for education and informational purposes only and should never be substituted for medical advice, diagnoses, or treatment. If you or someone you know may be in danger, call 911 or the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988 right away.